Zoë's Blog

You may be thinking I am french?

I feel a bit lost sometimes, either not recognising my personal roots anymore, or feeling enriched by my new world-wide ones.

I told you I grew up in France. You may be thinking I am french. Yes, I am, but my blood is in fact 3/4 German and 1/4 French, if we stop at the first generation…

But forget about the blood. I am wandering the world since 18 years now, so I am a bit far away from the french daily life since then. I don’t know what does it mean raising a child there; I don’t know anymore how much cost the medical insurance and how much we need to pay extra for care and medication; I don’t know anymore the cost of a coffee in town; and I am also lost regarding the released of french movies or daily political concerns.

During these 18 years I lived in 3 countries where I have invested a bit of myself, by speaking the language, understanding the way of living from neighborough customs to administrative needs. Three countries of adoption, four with the US. Four countries where cultural differences are almost at the extremes; where the food, daily rhythms, priorities, clothes, habits, religions, traditions, politics and work culture also differ extremely. And I tried to embrace these differences and adapt to the people’s rhythm and practices. Not easy… But I think that we as a family have tried to be part of it, learning and adapting our behavior constantly, as good European immigrants… I forgot to mention that part of the close family was Spanish!

But aren’t we all part of the same world anyway? With the same moon?

Des petits riens*

Memories….

That was one of my first record, I was about 8 at that time… And I don’t think I heard that many time since then, although I remembered the melody like I would have played it yesterday: “Les petits riens**” from Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. I heard it this morning on the road, on the Maine Public Radio. I was just very happy at the beginning, then very emotional, turning to totally decomposed, and finally feeling very good. Pffff, it is incredible what a single music can recall: the house where I lived, its odour, the music we listened, the relation I had with my father regarding classical music, my piano lessons, the record player, my sister and I dancing, the fire place…. all that at once!

Today passed very fast. Meetings, data analysis, emails…usually intense.

And tonight I got the magic of dancing under the stars. The magnificent sky sparkling and twinkling…. gorgous!

*Little nothings; **The little nothings, in french

Endless beginning

It is not the first time that this occurs to me, Years pass one by one. Moments come and go, it is time to eat, time to work, time to drink, time to sleep, and it comes back to another day. There are days to work, days to travel, days to feast, days to clean, days to rest. All of that was imprinted already in my head, conscienciouly part of my life.

Endless beginning.

Seasons are the rhythm of our life, our work time, school semesters, vacation, and traditional holidays. They come back with their colours and traditions. Slow rhythms: leaves grow, turn green, then red, and fall; trees dress themselves in spring, insects appear and disappear with the season too. In winter snow comes, snow turns ice, snow melts, snow comes back!

I am rediscovering the seasons. Singapore has very mild seasons. It is always hot and humid, a little bit more or a little bit less, a little more humid and rainy or a little bit more dry and sunny. The plants grow indefinitely, always bigger. And we just forget when things happened as we don’t remember the time of the year…

And here in the cold I realise how incredible it is, how nature can take over so quickly: the plants invade in the tropics, and water freeze and defreeze and refreeze in the cold country… how can we accompany this and live in harmony with these nature cycles?

Gong Xi Fa Cai*

This is the Lunar New Year of the Rat, the White Metal Rat!

In chinese culture, the rats were seen as a sign of wealth and surplus. They are quick thinkers and clever, and use their charm and aggressiveness to succeed in all endeavours, although they are also content with living a quiet and peaceful life. So it is natural that the Rat is a zodiac sign of hard work, independence, and success. The people born under the sign of the rat are forthright honest and easygoing… they are born in 2008, 1996, 1984, 1972, 1960, 1948. Every year of rat is associated to one of the 5 elements: wood, fire, earth, metal, and water. In the terms of Ying-Yang, the rat is yang and represents the beginning of a new day.

This is the biggest holiday in the Chinese community, and most of Chinese people are taking just these 2 to 3 weeks vacation leave in the entire year. It was actually the only time that some shops were closed in Singapore!

I remember my Chinese friends and colleagues preparing the festive season by cleaning their house before the holiday, cutting their hairs and buying new clothes and new furnitures. It is a good season to renew your house style! People would plan to visit all their relatives and eat eat eat… They also typically exchange commonly 2 tangerines, symbols of wealth, good luck, and good fortune and distribute red envelops filled with money in multiple of $2, especially to the children.

I know that my friends and family in Singapore are partying right now, I wish I would be there with you, cheers! Wishing health and prosperity to everybody! Gong Xi Fa Cai!!

*”Happy New Year” in Chinese

Frozen

Sundays are cleaning days. So last Sunday I made a washing machine. And it all went wrong! Water on the floor, with bubbles etc. the cycle was almost over and water flooding everywhere. I decided that these clothes could be considered clean… Nevertheless, I had to inform my landlord.

He reacted quickly but couldn’t find anybody available, so It is only today that somebody came to repair it. And here is the strange and interesting verdict:

The washing machine and dryer are inside the house (in an ante-room, they call it the mud room), but there is no heater so the temperature can be quite low. The shoes, coats, gloves and hat are indeed cold in the morning! So this particular weekend the weather was rather cold – remember this is when Mr. Jo was born – and this made the water inside the tubing freeze! So when I engage the cycle on the washing machine the water got thrown out and spread on the floor…

The plan is that the landlord will isolate better the wall so that I don’t have anymore problem. Hopefully!

We should really be ready for everything in this world!

Almost

I got scared. Suddenly I lost control, laugh to myself, then came back serious again… and if it would be true, that I would have to sleep outside or ask around for help??

I was misled because I just received in my mailbox the last packet: the Italian coffee maker! Yeahhhh!

Silly things happen! I forgot my phone in my car. Exchange my house shoes with Crocs, grabbed a coat, my car keys, and went outside. The door closed. I checked the door: I can lock from inside with the knob and suddenly had a doubt: the knob don’t come back sometimes… indeed, it stayed horizontal, as per locking the door from the inside…. the door was completely locked. I had no house keys, and I was certain I locked all doors around the house for the night. Would I sleep outside tonight?

I got my phone. Open the torchlight from the phone and had a short look around: snow everywhere, for sure I would be wet. What was the shortest way? I don’t know yet the house very well… I walked around towards the balcony. Among the 4 doors of the house one should be open, hopefully…

Indeed, you know that I am taking picture every morning or so from the balcony, view over Somer Sounds – the lake; so with the cold, the door doesn’t close very well. I am trying to lock it as much as I can, but obviously a little stroke can open it easily. Pffff. Lucky am I!

So I came back home, open the Amazon packet, looked at my super great coffee pot, and laughed again! That could have been a really bad evening!!

Positivity

I realised few days ago that I post mostly positive thoughts. It is not that I see “la vie en rose”, nor that nothing negative happens to me, nor that I am always happy.

And don’t think that I am hiding the worse that happens to me either: 6 “negative” posts are waiting in the draft folder, written after negative feelings, moment of blues, or rants. I didn’t finish them yet, I didn’t feel I would post them immediately, and they eventually stayed as a draft til now.

It is motivating to think that I possibly succeed in staying positive. I don’t think that’s the case, but certainly I improved a lot. Of course, living alone helps: I don’t have to bother with daily life complication since I can accommodate my time as I wish to, since I don’t depend on other’s schedule, I can change plans, or even, not be reasonable or organised for once. Life is easier. But some people around me, although they live alone, do complain a lot and seem to be depressed. So is there any secret?

I don’t know, maybe… maybe not. There are few things that I do pay attention though, or at least, things that I realise I do: (i) living the present: enjoying the landscape surrounding me by feeling the sun, the colors, the cold (!), the music, the tone of the voices, the slowness of movements; (ii) trying to put aside negative ideas or feelings, get rid of them as soon as I realized them, even though I could take some time to understand why I got these; (iii) try to see the other side of negative feelings, acts, or events, because if it comes from people, there might be a misunderstanding, and if it comes from events, that’s independent of our control; (iv) try to embrace these negative feelings…aouch, that’s the hardest!

Understand how I face these moments will hopefully help me be wiser with my family when I will be with them daily again. I am so much looking forward to this, and I wish I could stay as zen as I am right now! Lets’ hope, let’s stay positive!

By the way, did you know that yesterday, 21rst January, was the International Hugging Day? (International because it is observed in the US and in the UK!). Interestingly enough, a study published in Psychological Science Journal in 2014 revealed that hugging is very beneficial and may convey social support (Cohen et al., https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797614559284). Patients infected with a virus were less likely to develop severe symptoms if they were exposed to hugs or were feeling more social support from their friends and relatives! I think I’ll turn even more hippie with these thoughts! Let’s hug!!

Mr. Jo had company

Another great day at Mount Desert Island. Virgin sky in the morning, warm colours as the sun rose, despite the very cold weather of – 14 degrees Celcius! A fine soft layer of yesterday’s snow was still there, covering the icy chunk of snow from the other days. A bit slippery and my super coiled metallic spicky pro-under shoes were helpful during my short run. I am now prepared with layers of headscarves and triple gloves…

And when I came back home I realised that Mr. Jo had got company last night… few footprints were imprinted in the snow around his body; if only we could know what they were talking about!!

Like a Sunday

Today is Sunday. Sundays are synonyms of long runs, happiness, and calm. So here is what happened today:

A Skype with my loved ones in Singapore, namely Fidel, Jules and Lea;
Building a snow man after plowing the path for the first time in my life (as far as I remember);
14 km run at Beech Mountain;
A nice and sunny day;
After-run beer at the Dog and Pony bar in Bar Harbor (with crazy American junk food – all kind of fried things and spare ribs!)
The first fire at the fire place at home – just for me!

That was a good day!

Mr. Jo

Today I met Mr. Jo.

Mr. Jo is the fruit of my excitement, born from the soft and white snow that felt this night…. Mr. Jo has a big belly, few hairs, big eyes and a cigar. He is welcoming anyone who wants to come in my home!

I met him as I was busy plowing for the first time the path from the garage to the house entry. I think I did quite well, but I thought there was really too much snow not to built a snow man out of this! So this is how Mr. Jo was born!

Take care and stay cold!!